Anger and arguments are normal parts of healthy relationships.
But anger that leads to threats or violence, such as hitting or hurting,
is not normal or healthy. Physical, verbal, emotional, or sexual abuse are not
acceptable parts of any relationship.
Violent behavior is any behavior by an
individual that threatens or actually harms or injures the individual or others
or destroys property. Violent behavior often begins with verbal threats but
over time escalates to involve physical harm.
Violence is learned behavior, so it is especially important to help
your children learn that violence is not a healthy way to resolve conflict. Set
a good example by handling conflict in a calm and thoughtful manner. Never use
violence, such as spanking, pinching, ear pulling, jabbing, shoving, or
choking, to discipline your child.
The risk of
violence may be greater in men or women with:
- A history of childhood abuse.
- A history of violent
behavior.
- Low self-esteem and feelings of
hopelessness.
- Alcohol or drug use or abuse.
- Mental
health problems, such as
schizophrenia,
bipolar disorder, or personality
disorder).
- A history of arrests.
- A history
of attempted suicide.
- Feelings of suspicion or hostility.
Violent behavior may occur in cycles. First,
there is conflict and tension. This is followed by abuse of another or
destruction of property. This pattern usually repeats itself and gets worse
over time. If there is a cycle, learning to recognize
it may help you prevent violence from occurring.
If you are angry, hostile, or have violent behavior, it is important
to find help. You can learn ways to control your feelings and actions. Contact
the National Domestic Violence Hotline toll-free at 1-800-799-7233 or the
National Department on Mental Health at 1-888-793-4357. These agencies can help
you find the help you need.
